and all I remember, you burned it away

I got a new tumblr

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 00:41:06 -0400

http://microscope.tumblr.com/

look at the stars

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 23:40:51 -0400

you’re getting closer and closer but it was never anything to begin with.

If every surface you touch is cold, never go home

Mon, 08 Jun 2009 22:14:51 -0400

I was sitting next to you and all of the sudden wondered what the fuck I was doing.

I don’t know. I’m starting to think. Maybe you never felt anything for me.Maybe it was all for someone else. Are we even friends? Or am I just part of your help the helpless mission?

quarter life crisis

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 17:45:54 -0400

You no longer have a hold over me. Nothing, nothing, nothing. I won’t let you decide for me anymore, I won’t think of you anymore. I will still think of you, I can’t help that.. but as far as I’m concerned, I will not think of you first, or base anything around you. I’m alone and it’s a-oh-fucking-kay with me, because if I continued on, I would be alone anyways. Just alone and hanging on.

I will do whatever the fuck I please. If you don’t like it, you can go fuck yourself. I’m not yours if you are not mine. Deal with it.

won't you please be mine, love?

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 17:08:24 -0400

I need to stop being so angry. I don’t really have any right to be. And maybe that’s why I’m angry.

I have no rights because I am nothing to you. Oh, well I may be something, but not something that has a right to be pissed off for your double standards.

I must just remember this: I am nothing. There is nothing. Nothing is all there is.

coming down, the world turned over

Fri, 05 Jun 2009 02:18:04 -0400

I think it was funny after my realizations last night. I don’t count on you for anything anymore. I have no expectations. There is nothing there, in my mind. Or at least that’s what I need to tell myself.

That's why she thinks it's cooler if we'd just stay friends

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 20:49:33 -0400

you know what fucking pisses me off? you think it’s alright to speak to me and basically ignore me the whole time, but I know if I ever did that, you would freak out at me. I know you do if I don’t answer right away. now you know how it fucking feels

eventually it'll break your heart

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 20:46:35 -0400

you cannot make yourself happy this way. it will not work.

i wish i could write you beautiful words to fix it, but i can’t. i can’t fix anything

No Juliana next to my Evan

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 12:50:58 -0400

You would be so much happier without me.

divided, but I can't decide which side I'm on

Wed, 03 Jun 2009 11:27:46 -0400

When you talk about how annoying and needy his is, it makes me wonder if you feel the same way about me.

you know, are we actually friends? Or are we only “friends” because of your need to help everyone, which isn’t really friends at all, is it?

that I never really meant to stay

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 22:00:20 -0400

I think what hurts more than anything is that I can’t make you happy. I can’t cheer you up. I can’t really do much of anything. I feel so useless.

I know that to an extent, it IS my fault that I make you feel this way, and I hate it.

no goodbye

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 12:57:25 -0400

I fucking told you this would happen. I knew it all along. and I fucking said it would happen, and you said it wouldn’t, and it still did. I fucking told you.

are they laughing at you?

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 12:31:29 -0400

I hate it when you’re upset, because it makes me upset to an extent. And you really don’t care then. And it’s hard. and sometimes your words hurt, but I know you’re only saying it to help. And it helps, but it hurts.

you said goodbye, I said goodnight

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 03:16:12 -0400

you have no idea how happy it makes me when you smile

leave it all behind

Sat, 30 May 2009 23:50:08 -0400

You will never be there.

Tell yourself whatever the fuck helps you sleep at night, but you will never be there. You’re too self-fucking-absorbed to pull your head out of your ass and realize that YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY FUCKING PERSON ON THE PLANET.

straight up at the sun

Sat, 30 May 2009 23:49:00 -0400

You are so easily bent. I’m going to convince you to do things that you think are a bad idea, but want to do anyways.

I’m not talking ‘let’s make out.’

I’m talking ‘let’s get drunk… and then make out.’

I love the way you talk on top of me

Sat, 30 May 2009 23:44:56 -0400

I love the way that we’re never really talking about what we’re talking about

but the sun comes up instead

Sat, 30 May 2009 22:31:59 -0400

There’s two people I’m concerned about seeing in the fall. One because he’s going to try and date me and/or be super controlling, because that’s what he does. The other because I honestly have no idea what will happen when we see each other again.

but you don't have the sense to tie your tangled tongue

Fri, 29 May 2009 23:44:26 -0400

Or, in less poetic terms, I never know when to keep my mouth shut.

The hurt that the head forgets, the heart will always rememeber

Fri, 29 May 2009 13:05:52 -0400

Sometimes I wish I could shake you and tell you to stop being such a silly little boy.